It's a Real Challenge

One of the things mentioned often when telling people how to manage retirement and getting older is to keep your mind active. Challenge your brain, they say. Don’t become mental couch potato. Just because you are no longer working doesn’t mean your mind goes on a permanent holiday.

what I'm learning now - how to knit using
double pointed needles

In fact, they (the people who think they know) say that it is just as important to keep your brain active as it is to keep your body active. It is a good way to keep you both interested in life and an interesting person, and at the same time stave off depression and dementia. Check out this BrainyApp from Alzheimer’s Australia.

There are many different lists of things to do to keep the brain active, but some items are on ALL those lists:

• Learn a language
• Exercise
• Learn a musical instrument
• Do crosswords, or other such brain games
• Be creative

Well, not trying to be negative (actually, thinking positive is another item that is on many lists), but for some people, these just aren’t going to happen. Maybe these are just excuses, but this is my story.

the Serbian textbooks and notepad,
along with books about other things
(creative things) on the To Learn list

I had all good intentions of learning a language. I enjoy words, discovering the stories about words, and learning how other languages work, so it seemed a good idea. But which language to learn? English is coming pretty easily to me these days,so not that language, although sometimes I just can’t find the word I really want to use. I studied German for my HSC so try something different. I had a brief flirtation with Spanish when I had a holiday in Mexico, so again, I wanted something different. I know! Go for something where not only the words are foreign, but so is the script, to make it even more of a challenge for me – Serbian!

I found an online resource where I could progress through structured lessons, and hear the words being spoken. I got some books to help. I even knew a person who spoke Serbian fluently. I set myself a goal of learning at least one new verb (fully conjugated) each week. I made heaps of notes in my notepad (the paper kind). I took my notepad with me everywhere, and got some strange looks as I was practising words on the train. All good so far.

But it just wasn’t sticking in my brain. Gradually I did less and less, until eventually I stopped altogether. It just wasn’t going to happen for me. My excuses:

• I didn’t have enough opportunities to practise with other, real, people
• I chose a language that had too many new things to learn (words and script)
• I chose a language that isn’t very common in Australia, and particularly in regional Australia
• Whilst I enjoyed learning a new language, I didn’t enjoy it ENOUGH – well not enough for me to try to overcome the problems I was having and make it a priority

These days, the words that have stuck are the ones you would expect – hello, please, and cheers!

the exercise bike is a bit dusty

the victim - testing the glove for size -
double pointed needles have NOT beaten me!

Maybe I will get back to it and increase my vocabulary a bit more, and at least re-learn to count. Then I will be able to work my brain and my body when I’m counting repetitions during my exercise. Yep, there’s a story there too – stay tuned!

The Birthday Festival

venue for one family birthday celebration

What is a birthday? According to the OED, it is “The anniversary of the day on which a person was born, typically treated as an occasion for celebration and the giving of gifts”. According to a friend of mine, the whole month in which his birthday falls should be treated as an occasion for celebration – a festival, in fact. I’m not sure if he feels that should happen for everyone, or just him?

We recently celebrated the birthdays of one sister and Mum
 - cake tasted fantastic!

My family are more into the understated type of celebration – a phone call is usually made on the actual birthday, but a card, if sent, will rarely arrive on time, or even in the same month. Gifts tend to be given on an ad hoc basis. This is not simply something that has developed as we have all gotten older, as I think we have all been like it for many years. I don’t know why. I wonder how it started?

Just because I am part of this family and also follow the family “tradition” of understated celebration, doesn’t mean I have to like it. Well, not all of it, anyway. I am a definite fan of the giving of gifts that are ad hoc.

Aboriginal stencil art - found on a walk we did
on Les' birthday getaway

What it means is that any gifts that are given are not just things bought because there was a birthday and something had to be given. The gifts are given because something was seen or thought of for that particular person, so it was given then – why wait for a birthday as a reason to give it? Why not give it right then? Sometimes this happens to coincide with someone’s birthday – but more often than not, it doesn’t. And why give something unsuitable or unwanted, just because a birthday has occurred?

Birthday fun!

And here is the part I’m not a fan of. By taking an understated approach to celebrating a birthday, it can be interpreted as lack of interest, lack of feeling, being forgotten. That may not be what is real, but it can easily be what is perceived. And I don’t like that.

So I started a little rebellion. For several years now, I’ve made a concerted effort to make hand-made birthday cards for people, and get them into the mail so they arrive as close as possible, but still prior to, the actual birthday. And these are real cards, not e-cards. I haven’t always been successful. In fact, I am writing this in the knowledge that the birthday cards to one sister and my mother will be late. And I will slip-up in the future, but I will continue to try.

Secret Creek - for Les' birthday lunch

At this point in my life, I do count the number of years for some anniversaries, like since marriage and since retirement. I no longer need to count the number of birthdays I have had, although I will readily admit to how many, if asked. But I do still get a nice warm feeling inside when someone remembers when it is, and treats it as “an occasion for celebration”. Les and I do that for each other, and that makes me happy.

I can't help myself!

Time, always a flexible thing, at least as far as I’m concerned, has done it again. I’m one of the many people who say “where has the time gone?”. Is it my imagination, or are most of those many people who say it of the slightly older generation?

All those statements like:

• I can’t believe it’s June (or substitute whatever month of the year you like) already!
• The year seems to go by faster every year!
• It seems we’ve only just had Easter and already we are thinking about Christmas!
• How on earth did I ever have time to go to work?

We finally managed to find time to visit Dunn's Swamp

part of the walk at Dunn's Swamp

All this is just me trying to find excuses for neglecting my blog. Yep, I’ve been busy. Nope, I can’t really detail all the things I’ve been doing to be so busy.

One thing I’ve been busy with is a new project. I can’t help myself, I suppose. Once a business analyst, always a business analyst? I saw a problem, and just had to try to solve it.

The problem? How to stop our craft cottage from going the same way as many others – closure as a result of not being financially viable. Without boring people with my thought process, it’s meant that I’ve spent the last few months working to get Rankin Cottage Crafts Inc onto the internet. Have a look !

This is just part of the solution to the problem – a solution that I haven’t got fully detailed yet, but at least it’s a start. Watch this space (or at least, the Rankin Cottage Crafts space) for further developments.

a vest I knitted - now in Rankin Cottage,
waiting for someone to love it

In the process of setting up the Rankin Cottage Crafts page, I’ve been learning about how to do all sorts of different things with a blog. I’ve even been forced to use html – much as I tried to avoid it, I just couldn’t. One of the things suggested for retired people is to learn a language to keep the brain active, but I don’t think html is the kind of language they were talking about. Mind you, at the moment, I’m only at the stage of being able to do the equivalent of reciting things from a phrasebook whilst not really understanding what they mean. I don’t think I’ll ever be fluent, but I hope to be able to make myself understood.

I have had a little time to update my own blog – to add a page to show a gallery of things I’ve made. This is a work in progress – I’m just mucking around, practising my language skills. Who knows what will happen as I learn more.

It's All About Balance

serious balance was required on this walk

I don’t have very good balance. If I’m out bushwalking and have to use a log or something similar to cross a watercourse, I’m very nervous. I’ve been known to sit down on it and move across it, very slowly, on my bottom.

If I’m wearing shoes with high heels, I’m very nervous. I sprained my ankle once, walking along a footpath in thongs, because I overbalanced.

Whenever I travel in public transport, if there’s standing room only, I have to make sure I am close to something I can hold onto firmly. Over the years I’ve had more than one situation where I’ve fallen (or almost) onto or into someone, and not all of those were because of sudden movements of the bus or train. It amazes me when I see people standing in the trains or buses, and not holding on for grim death like I have to. How do they do it?

It also amazes me that when I was at school, one of my favourite sports was gymnastics. Yup, I even did work on the beam! I do remember falling off a fair bit, but I didn’t get laughed out of the team.

is there such as thing as too many hats? ask Phryne Fisher!
at the exhibition of her costumes

But, apparently it is all about practice. For several years now, I’ve been doing exercise classes where they very deliberately include elements to work on balance. And they have made a difference. I am still not confident that I’m not going to wobble and fall off that log over the creek, but I do feel that I won’t embarrass myself on the train.

And it’s the same thing when it comes to work-life balance. Actually, I don’t like that term – never have. When I was working, it felt like it was saying that my life was only outside of work, and since I spent so much time at work, that was pretty miserable. And now that I’m not working, how can I have balance if I don’t have work? So I like to think of it as balance in life.

is there such a thing as
a balanced Manly supporter?

Anyway, anyone who is working, or has worked, has heard about how important it is to keep a balance to their life (the work-life balance).  Many work-places have policies in place to address this, although I’m not sure how well they are implemented. And I think some companies don’t really mean it. It is a well-discussed problem – we know we need to do something about it.

But retiring doesn’t mean I can forget about balance. It’s still possible to have an unbalanced life when I’m not working.  See? I still need to think of it as balance to my life, not work-life balance.

I have to keep balance in my diet – not too much chocolate, not too little chocolate, but just the right amount. I have to keep balance in my activity – include exercise as well as vegetating on the lounge. I have to have balance in the amount of time for myself as well as everyone else I think I have to look after. I have to balance those meaningful pursuits with trivial pursuits. I have to balance chores with things I do just for the hell of it.

the amount of chocolate is Just Right!

It takes practice to keep the balance in my life. If I stop practising, it gets harder and harder to keep that chocolate consumption at the “just right” level. Actually, I don’t think I will ever get the balance “just right”. But I’ll keep trying. Retirement isn’t all fun and games, but it also isn’t all just doing things that have to be done, or should be done.

It’s all about balance, and with practice, I will get better at it. As long as I’m enjoying it, that’s the main thing!

Swings and Roundabouts - Mayfield Gardens

I might have mentioned once or twice before that us retired people can often take advantage of the fact that there are many fewer people around during the week at places we want to go. On week days it is wonderful to be able to take our time wandering around, taking things in. On weekends, we would be trying to dodge thousands of people, or waiting patiently for people to move out of the way of that perfect photo opportunity only to have some other inconsiderate people move directly into the frame.

No inconsiderate people in this photo opportunity

Today we ticked an item off our “To Do List” (a retirement “To Do List” is much more fun than a business “To Do List”). We headed off down to Oberon and Mayfield Garden. For the first time, it is open during the week instead of just on the weekends, so of course we chose a week day to go. And we were well rewarded for that – only one tour bus and about 15 cars in the car park when we got there, so in a garden that covers 160 acres, you certainly don’t notice the people.

how's this for autumn colours?

The garden is absolutely fantastic. And if you think spring is the best time to visit a garden, think again – this garden is specifically a cold-climate garden and the autumn colours are magnificent. Mind you, I think a visit in spring will be on the “To Do List” as well.

I only took about 125 photos today. How will I choose which ones to include here? Maybe just a heap of photos at the end? It took us over 2 hours to wander around the garden, so only 125 photos was quite restrained.

I may also have mentioned once or twice before that there is a downside to taking our outings on week days – not everything is open. Yep, swings and roundabouts.

the entrance to the coffee
(and food, on weekends)

On weekends there is food available for purchase, so you can wander around the garden then head back to the food area for a nice bit of lunch. Alas, no food on week days. BUT, there is still coffee! Yippee! And the coffee is the lovely Fish River Roasters, a local mob, so I was very happy. If we’d felt inclined, we could have had a lemon tart, or chocolate macaron, but no meal-type food.

However, since we are now experienced at Mid-Week Escapades, we know to check before we go what will actually be open. So we packed our lunch. By the time it was lunch time, we’d seen all we wanted to see of Mayfield Garden, and went to Oberon Dam hoping there would be a picnic area there. Unfortunately not, but it was still a lovely view from the car as we ate lunch.

So even when there is a down side to taking the outing during the week, it can be made into an up side. That is one of the great things about being retired – flexibility and heaps of options. So for us, it was a case of what we gained on the swings we also gained on the roundabout.

Oberon Dam - our view at lunch

Gotta love retirement!

Now, as promised, more photos from Mayfield Garden.

an inconsiderate person in this shot - but maybe it gives perspective? 

Who Moved My Cheese?

What would I do without cheese? I love all different sorts of cheese, so it’s a real pity that it has to be limited in my diet, as I’m supposed to be following a low-fat diet in order to counter high cholesterol.

My first memory of cheese is of Kraft Cheddar. You know the one that comes in a box and is NOT found in the refrigerated section of the supermarket, but on the normal grocery shelves. I think it’s in with the jams and spreads, but I don’t think I’ve eaten it since I left home, so I’m not sure. Actually, I’m not even sure it’s cheese, is it? We used to eat it grated and mixed up with tomato sauce – yum!

I like to think that my tastes have matured since then. My snack of choice when I was going to university was cheese, vegemite and pickled onions on Ryvita. I was living in on-campus accommodation where the food was provided in the dining room, so you can imagine how bad that food was if I was snacking on that concoction!

I was at Macquarie Uni recently for the first time in 30 years
this part of the university hasn't changed

When I moved into self-catering accommodation with friends, we branched out, and discovered camembert and brie. I also took a liking to some of the hard cheeses, as long as they were not too strong.

When I travelled overseas, I encountered goat’s cheese. We stopped at a farm somewhere in France, and they gave us some to taste. We liked it so much we even bought some from them. Even when we discovered that the black stuff on the outside of it was ash, we still liked it.

I’ve graduated to liking the stronger cheeses. I eat cheeses that I didn’t know existed when I was first out in the wide world fending for myself – fetta, haloumi, real cheddar, parmesan (I still think it smells like vomit). But I still can’t eat blue cheese. I’ve no idea why.

this part of Macquarie Uni has definitely changed
for the better!

Now, I have to limit my consumption of all those types of cheeses – about the only ones I’m allowed to eat a lot of are ricotta and cottage cheese. Such a pity they are so bland! How much I’ve changed since my days eating Kraft Cheddar!

So I have no problems with my changing cheese preferences. I’ve also had no problems adapting to the change of moving to Bathurst. I’ve had little hiccups with the change of moving from being a working person to being a retired person, but they are well and truly over now, so no problems there.

But there are some areas where I struggle with change.

For example, I hate some of the changes that come with getting older. It takes me longer to recover from strenuous exercise. I’m more likely to forget where I parked the car when I go to the shopping centre. It’s no longer a case of my mother looking after me, but of me looking after my mother.

Maggie was very cautious when  her scratching pole first
appeared - but I think she has adapted

Just when I think things have settled down, something will change again! Change is inevitable, though, so I can’t ignore it and hope it will go away. I do, however, have choices. I can look at the options and choose what I will do. I can still do the strenuous exercise, and be grateful that I am retired and have the time to recover at my own pace. I can always park the car in the same general place at the shopping centre, or park it in all different sorts of places and use it as a memory challenge. I can accept that my mother needs my help, and do whatever I can to make her life better.

My life keeps on changing. Sometimes I like it that it has changed. Other times it really cheeses me off (pun intended). I just have to keep remembering that I have adapted before, and I will adapt again. Retiring doesn’t mean that things will stay the same forever.

Credit needs to be given here to the book Who Moved My Cheese?

This Week I...

I feel like I’m lurching from week to week without actually achieving anything. This isn’t true, but that’s how it feels. I do have a diary that pretty much everything goes into, because if it isn’t in the diary, it won’t happen! But I don’t really look at that to see what has happened in the past – it is just to make sure I know what is coming up in the future.

We have been keeping a diary since we retired, but in reality, it is Les who has the discipline to write in it every day. Me – it’s just not part of my routine, so I don’t even think about it. I’d like to say that I’m simply too busy doing things to write about them, but that wouldn’t be true. And because it is Les who does the updates, I don’t think about what has happened each day, and the day passes without me consciously thinking I’ve actually done something.

One reason for keeping a diary in retirement is so that feeling of just going along, day by day, with nothing ever happening, and thinking that the retirement  is being wasted, can be kept at bay. Because I’m not writing in the diary, I need to find another way. This week, I thought I’d try taking photos as a way of remembering. Taking photos helps me remember in two different ways – the most obvious, in that I can look at the photos at a later date and remember, but also because the simple act of taking the photo makes the moment stick in my mind better.

Here are some of the moments from my week.

I finally got around to making tomato chutney from the tomatoes given to me at tennis last week.

I was given more tomatoes at tennis this week!

I picked tomatoes from my own plants. Maybe I find a recipe for tomato sauce?

Friends I have known for more than 30 years visited!

We toured through Ben Chifley’s house, bringing back memories of our own parents’/grandparents’ homes. My mum still uses a toaster like the one in this photo!

To keep the historical theme going, we visited Sofala for the Rebellion on the Turon.

I added to my egg cosy repertoire – these will go on sale in the Craft Shop.

I realised how weird the weather has been this year, with the apple tree having flowers on it – it’s autumn! Not spring!!

We rescued a frog from inside the house. It had been company in the shower for one of our guests, but when it ventured out into the living area, and Maggie-cat got interested, we thought it would be better off in the greenhouse.

And that was the week that was, so I know I've actually been reasonably busy. Do I think I can keep up this photo diary? Who knows. But I do like the idea of having a pictorial diary of my retirement, even if it is just of jars of chutney and piles of tomatoes!

It's No Holiday

near Lithgow

Well, actually, it is kind of like a holiday – retirement, that is. It all depends on how you define a holiday.

Of course I researched this – what is the definition of a holiday? The Oxford English Dictionary (OED) says it is “an extended period of leisure and recreation, especially one spent away from home or in travelling”. Wikipedia says it is “a day set aside by custom or by law on which normal activities, especially business or work, are suspended or reduced”. If I go by the OED, then my retirement certainly is a holiday, because it most definitely is an extended period of leisure and recreation, even though it isn’t always away from home or travelling. But if I go by Wikipedia, it isn’t.

All the time I was working, I had this vague idea that when I retired, it would be like I was on holiday all the time. And according to the OED, I am. But it doesn’t feel the same, and I think it’s because my idea of what a holiday is has changed. Well, maybe it hasn’t changed so much as it has been clarified.

one of the waterfalls on our most recent holiday
near Leura

I have definitely come down on the side of Wikipedia. A holiday is really a break from doing whatever it is I do every day. When you are working, a holiday is when you don’t go to work, and do something else instead. But just because I don’t go to work doesn’t mean I don’t have normal activities that I occasionally need a break from. And that, to me, is a holiday.

Holidays are a total necessity. When I was working, I wasn’t one of these people who accumulated an enormous annual leave balance, or got a visit from the company accountant telling me to “at least put in a leave form, so we can pretend you will go on holidays”. I usually had to check I had a balance at all before I could go on my next holiday! In some cases, I think I actually owed leave days to the company. I really needed my holidays.

some steps on a walk we DIDN'T do
near Leura

I think I used to get into a real rut, heading off to work each day, doing the same things each day, week, month. The enjoyment wears off a bit. Taking holidays meant I could recharge my batteries and go back to work and “real life” with a renewed enthusiasm for the job. The time off was also a chance to take a step back and look at my working life to see if it was what I wanted, and if anything needed changing.

Holidays were also a chance to see things, go places, and do things that I couldn’t see, go to or do when I was at home (or work).

Well, guess what – it’s exactly the same in retirement. No matter how much I enjoy doing the things I do in my “real life”, I need a holiday from it sometimes. The days, weeks, months would all blur in together and become years, and whilst I wouldn’t dislike it, I wouldn’t be enjoying it as much.

Don’t get me wrong – I absolutely enjoy being retired, and am not looking for sympathy. I really am at the beginning of “an extended period of leisure and recreation” (see OED definition of “holiday” above).

the results from my most recent "real life" activities

But, my advice is to make sure any retirement planning includes holidays – real, specific times designated as holidays, when you do something different to the normal activities of your retirement. Retirement is not just the rest of your life being one long holiday – it can be so much more! 

Kenny Rogers - Part II

Now where was I before I was so rudely interrupted by life? Ah, yes, that good ol’ Kenny Rogers song The Gambler. It has more wise words than just on letting go. I also like:

Oh to be as flexible as a cat!

Now ev'ry gambler knows that the secret to survivin'
Is knowin' what to throw away and knowing what to keep.

It’s not possible to keep everything. Just look at those people you see on A Current Affair, where the neighbours are at their wits’ end because the hoarding is totally out of control, has taken over the whole house, and is threatening to take over the whole suburb. It takes effort to properly look after the things you keep. So it’s worth it to let things go, or throw them away, so the things that are important, the things that are kept, are kept in good condition.

the tree is actually growing up
through the truck

When I stopped working, the things I missed most were the people. I was with these people for a significant proportion of my life, so of course I was going to miss them. But did I want to keep them? Were they just work friends? Had they become just friends – no adjective needed? Could they become just friends if I wanted them to?

Yep, I had to work out what, or rather who, to throw away, and who to keep. That sounds pretty harsh, but in reality, it usually isn’t a case of throwing away, but rather letting them fade away. It’s a natural progression. It happens all the time. At first it’s regular lunches to catch up. Then it’s coffee every now and then. Then it’s the occasional invitation to a group lunch. Then it’s the “we must catch up some time for coffee/drinks/lunch” when you cross paths in the street. Then before you know it, it’s the 20 year reunion!

So it’s nothing to feel guilty about if I don’t keep in contact with all those people I miss. It is enormously important, though, to make the effort with the people I know I want to keep. That has become a tiny little bit more difficult since we moved to Bathurst, but it is worth the effort.

finally finished my mosaic pot
maybe 18 months after starting
- all 4 sides are different

I’m not the kind of person who has lots of friends. I have a smaller number of friends, but I like to think that they are good ones – ones I can count on. Some of these friends I met at jobs I have had in the past, and I have been lucky enough to keep them. Reflecting on it now, I can see that we are actually better friends now than when we worked together. I think this is because when we worked together, we didn’t have to put in much effort. When we no longer worked together, we had to put in the effort to stay connected, find out what things we had in common apart from work, and really learn about each other.

And it is important to have friends – to keep them even when circumstances change, like leaving the workforce. Friends help me stay grounded (they will tell me when I’m being dill), and they help me still feel like a real person, instead of a boring old retiree! And those friends who are still in the workforce themselves help me to keep in touch with the world (it’s very easy to lose that when you are retired), and at the same time remind me of why I retired.

these carrots are close friends!
maybe I should have planted them
further apart?

After 3 years of retirement, I pretty much know now which friends I’m keeping. There aren’t that many of them, but they mean a lot to me. Like Kenny says, they are the secret to surviving.

These are "real" friends I'm talking about. If I was talking about Facebook friends – that’s a whole other story!

On Letting Go

I’m not really a Kenny Rogers kind of girl (or should that be “kind o’ gal”?). I know I moved to the country, but that doesn’t mean my taste in music has changed. There is one of his songs, though, that speaks to me – The Gambler. The particular lines I'm talking about are:

You got to know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em, 

Know when to walk away and know when to run.

random photo 1
a creek bed near Silverton NSW

By the way, in researching this, I discovered that Kenny didn’t actually write this song. It was written by that powerhouse of country music, Don Schlitz. Don Who? If you don’t know him from his country songs (I certainly didn’t), you may recognise another song he wrote – “When You Say Nothing At All”, most recently popular in its Ronan Keating incarnation. I quite like that song, but I find it to be a real earworm.

Back on track, after that little side-trip, and I’m talking about knowing when to let go. It sounds simple, but it isn’t. How do you know?

random photo 2
Sturt's Desert Pea, Broken Hill NSW

That was what it was like for me with retirement. As I’ve mentioned before, when I stopped working, I was very reluctant to call it retirement. It made me feel better to just say that I’d stopped working.  I didn’t know if I was ready to retire. Part of it was also a reluctance to let go. Work had been such a big part of my life for so long, it was hard to let it go. So I let go gradually.

I worked part-time for a while, and that suited me really well. It gave me the time I needed to experience what it was like not working, and at the same time kept me connected to the work environment. There wasn’t the sudden loss of connections with people and activities that I’d known for so long. It gave me the opportunity to start building up the non-work connections and activities that I would need when I was not working.

Then, the Big Change – stopping work altogether! It was scary, yet exciting, and I wasn’t sure how I would go. So I STILL didn’t really let go. I kept some (not all) of the work people connections. Some friends really didn’t believe that I would stay retired, and I didn’t disabuse them of that, because I didn’t really know if I believed it either.

random photo 3
lavender in Kangaroo Valley NSW

After some time, I was ready to include work back into my retirement. That may sound strange, but many people partially retire, and I thought that would be good for me. So I did a bit of work. I enjoyed it, mostly, but I noticed that whilst I was still doing the best job I could, and I hope that was good enough for those I was working for, I didn't have the same enthusiasm for it as before.

That work dried up, and it was probably a good thing. I knew I had really let go by my reaction when I went to catch up with a (working) friend. There were all these people sitting around having meetings in the coffee shop, deep in earnest discussion. And I just knew that I couldn't do that and feel I was giving it my best. If I couldn't give it my best, I couldn't do it.

That was me finding out when to fold ‘em. Everyone is different. Some people die at the table! I walked away gradually. For some, they need to run. At some point in the retirement process, everyone needs to let go of work. Trying to work out what kind of letting go is best for you can be hard. One thing I’ve learnt, though, is that, whilst you need to give the option you choose your absolute best shot, it doesn’t have to be the final decision – you can change your mind!

Yep, Kenny, I finally folded, and walked away. I don’t regret it. I did it in the way that worked for me. 

random photo 4
a beach somewhere