Who Moved My Cheese?

What would I do without cheese? I love all different sorts of cheese, so it’s a real pity that it has to be limited in my diet, as I’m supposed to be following a low-fat diet in order to counter high cholesterol.

My first memory of cheese is of Kraft Cheddar. You know the one that comes in a box and is NOT found in the refrigerated section of the supermarket, but on the normal grocery shelves. I think it’s in with the jams and spreads, but I don’t think I’ve eaten it since I left home, so I’m not sure. Actually, I’m not even sure it’s cheese, is it? We used to eat it grated and mixed up with tomato sauce – yum!

I like to think that my tastes have matured since then. My snack of choice when I was going to university was cheese, vegemite and pickled onions on Ryvita. I was living in on-campus accommodation where the food was provided in the dining room, so you can imagine how bad that food was if I was snacking on that concoction!

I was at Macquarie Uni recently for the first time in 30 years
this part of the university hasn't changed

When I moved into self-catering accommodation with friends, we branched out, and discovered camembert and brie. I also took a liking to some of the hard cheeses, as long as they were not too strong.

When I travelled overseas, I encountered goat’s cheese. We stopped at a farm somewhere in France, and they gave us some to taste. We liked it so much we even bought some from them. Even when we discovered that the black stuff on the outside of it was ash, we still liked it.

I’ve graduated to liking the stronger cheeses. I eat cheeses that I didn’t know existed when I was first out in the wide world fending for myself – fetta, haloumi, real cheddar, parmesan (I still think it smells like vomit). But I still can’t eat blue cheese. I’ve no idea why.

this part of Macquarie Uni has definitely changed
for the better!

Now, I have to limit my consumption of all those types of cheeses – about the only ones I’m allowed to eat a lot of are ricotta and cottage cheese. Such a pity they are so bland! How much I’ve changed since my days eating Kraft Cheddar!

So I have no problems with my changing cheese preferences. I’ve also had no problems adapting to the change of moving to Bathurst. I’ve had little hiccups with the change of moving from being a working person to being a retired person, but they are well and truly over now, so no problems there.

But there are some areas where I struggle with change.

For example, I hate some of the changes that come with getting older. It takes me longer to recover from strenuous exercise. I’m more likely to forget where I parked the car when I go to the shopping centre. It’s no longer a case of my mother looking after me, but of me looking after my mother.

Maggie was very cautious when  her scratching pole first
appeared - but I think she has adapted

Just when I think things have settled down, something will change again! Change is inevitable, though, so I can’t ignore it and hope it will go away. I do, however, have choices. I can look at the options and choose what I will do. I can still do the strenuous exercise, and be grateful that I am retired and have the time to recover at my own pace. I can always park the car in the same general place at the shopping centre, or park it in all different sorts of places and use it as a memory challenge. I can accept that my mother needs my help, and do whatever I can to make her life better.

My life keeps on changing. Sometimes I like it that it has changed. Other times it really cheeses me off (pun intended). I just have to keep remembering that I have adapted before, and I will adapt again. Retiring doesn’t mean that things will stay the same forever.

Credit needs to be given here to the book Who Moved My Cheese?

That Time of Year

It’s that quiet time of year again. The chaos of Christmas and welcoming in the new year has passed and there are a few weeks before normal life starts all over again. It’s the time of year when I usually take the time to look back over what the previous year was, and look forward to what the coming year can be.

All in all, 2013 was a good year for me. I can look back and be happy. There were big changes, which I don’t usually handle very well, so the fact that I remember the year as happy means I coped just fine.

Country bears catching up with the City cousins

Now the question is, what about 2014? I don’t make New Year’s resolutions – gave that up a long time ago. I realised that just because a new year had started didn’t mean I was magically going to find the discipline, motivation, time, mindset or any of the other tools that I would need but had not managed to find at any other time of the year. I mean, really, what makes the start of a new year any different?

The start of a new year is just an arbitrary line we have made in the sand. There is nothing intrinsically special about it. When it actually occurs is different depending on who you are – a follower of the Gregorian calendar, or the Islamic calendar, or any of the other calendars out there, or an accountant. Despite all this, there is a commonality – with all of these calendars, it's like everything from last year gets wiped clean and starts afresh. That even goes for the accountant – is zero-based budgeting still around?

Easter bunnies just around the corner
from the on-sale Lindt bears!

But wiping the slate clean doesn’t mean I’m going to change. I will still have an addiction to chocolate (in fact that is usually made worse around this time of year, due mainly to Lindt chocolate Christmas bears being on special for $1 at Target). I will still be unable to run (I’ve tried to do the C25K program at least 3 times – maybe I’ll try again this year, using a new app on my phone – that might make all the difference!). I will still HATE housework (the only time I could deal with it was when I had a cleaner).

As a result, there is no point in me making those resolutions that are standard for most people – lose weight, get fit, get the house looking reasonable. As for that most important resolution of all – not work so hard and spend more time with family – I’m retired, for goodness sake, how can I work less?

Healthy lunches of chocolate,
wine and coffee!

This year will be no different to last year. I will make a list of the things I want to do and be, make a plan for how I will try to tick those things off the list, and know that at this time next year, I will be doing the same thing again. But as I said, last year was a good one for me. I’m hoping that 2014 will be a good one too.

Fitting In

I’m back. I didn’t mean to be gone for so long. Then when I realised just how long it had been, it became embarrassing. I won’t go into all the reasons why, as that would just be boring. BUT, I have realised that, despite all my grand ideals of wanting to write a blog just for me, I do crave feedback. So, IWBNI (“it would be nice if” – don’t know if that’s an abbreviation used by the texting generation, but this oldie was using it about 20 years ago!) anyone who reads this blog would leave a comment, at least every now and then, just so I know I’m reaching people.

Plattie and Cuddles
made by me for the craft shop

Now on to the subject at hand. Fitting in.

We humans are a complicated lot. Pretty much all of us go looking for similar people, so we can feel part of the group. I think it is a survival thing, from way back in the mists of time, when if you were different, you could be cast out of the safety of the group. Survival outside the group was tough.

But we also want to be seen as different. I know that I want to be recognised as uniquely me. Whilst this seems like a contradiction, I think it is more like a delicate balancing act.

When we moved to Bathurst, I was conscious of the fact that I wanted to fit in, but I also wanted to not fit in so well that I became invisible. And I wanted to fit in with a diverse group of people. I didn’t want to only connect with retired people over 50. I also wanted to connect with younger people, people who are different to me.

how good are the apricots looking!

One of the good things about working was that I was engaging with (those are words from my work life) lots of different people. It was challenging at times, but it was also enriching. It is more difficult to find this sort of thing when retired, and even more so by being in a new town.  

I’ve found a lovely group of people through playing tennis. They are all women, they are all over 60, and they are all not working, but they come from a wide range of backgrounds and have varied opinions on things. Conversation around the morning tea table is active and entertaining. In fact, conversation on the tennis court can be so active and entertaining that we forget what the score is. Lucky none of us are playing for sheep stations!



cross-stitch Christmas decorations
also made by me for the craft shop

Speaking of sheep stations, since starting with the tennis girls, I’ve learnt more about sheep farming than I did in all the years I spent in Parkes. And last week at tennis as I stepped over the lamb tails on the ground as I walked to the tennis court, I realised it was the first time I’d ever seen that.

So back on the subject of fitting in, I’m fairly happy with my progress so far.  As well as the tennis girls, I’ve also found a group of people with an interest in craft, so that area of my

from the social pages
my niece and me at THE local coffee shop

interests is covered.

And I’ve made it to the social pages of the local paper! The tennis girls are so jealous – I’ve been here 5 minutes and am in the social pages, whilst some of them have been here for decades (or from birth, in one case) and still haven’t made it.

Now I just have to find a way to expand the circle so it includes some more different people. That might not be so easy. My hairdresser told me the other day that one of her other clients, also new to town, has found Bathurst to be a difficult town to make good social friends in. I’ll have to put in a real effort, then. I’m not sure how, both from the point of view of finding the people and finding the time. But watch this space!

Coffee, and Rituals

I’m not a coffee snob. I draw the line at International Roast (it’s not really coffee, is it), but other than that, if it’s after 10:30am and I haven’t had a coffee yet, I’ll drink pretty much any kind of coffee. But I do have some preferences.

I like my coffee to be in a proper mug, not one of those takeaway things. I have been known to send a coffee back because I asked for it in a proper mug but it came in a takeaway one. If I have to have a takeaway (because I’m taking it away), I like it to be without a lid. I mean really, since I’m getting a cappuccino, there isn’t a lot of point if most of the creamy top of it, along with all the chocolate sprinkled on top, is stuck to the lid.

I like to have the time to actually enjoy my coffee. Savouring the creamy top and the lovely coffee flavour are a major reason why I love coffee. If I have to rush it, or do something else at the same time, I can’t do it justice.

My morning tea ritual

I like the creamy milk on top of my coffee to be just that – creamy. Not frothy, creamy. Frothy is just all air, and quite disappointing. I’d rather have a thin layer of creamy than a huge pile of frothy.

I like my coffee like Goldilocks does – not too hot, and not too cold, but Just Right! Too cold means I have to drink it faster than I’d like. Too hot means it burns my mouth and I have to wait for it to cool down a bit. Just Right means I can start sipping right away, taking my time to finish it, and not have it go cold before I do.

I like my coffee to have a bit of flavour. Sometimes the smell of the coffee is just wonderful, but the taste is a real let-down.

I like my coffee to come with a spoon. That way, I can spoon the creamy top off and “eat” it first, then sip the rest of the drink. Those paddle-pop stick things do a reasonable job if you just want to stir the coffee, but they just don’t work well as spoons.

We ritually take photos of our Kids, doing naughty things

But these preferences are just me. Most coffee drinkers have their preferences, and I don’t judge them if those preferences are not the same as mine. My Dad, for example, had a simple preference for “ordinary coffee with ordinary milk in it – none of that frothy crap” (that’s a direct quote from him ordering a coffee in a café on the North Shore in Sydney). A good friend always orders hers “extra hot, and if it isn’t hot enough, I’ll send it back”. Another friend always leaves half the cup.

But what do I do at home? Well, that is where the ritual comes in. I didn’t realise how much of a ritual it had become until I was thinking about routine in my day. Morning tea is a significant part of the routine. (Maybe I should call it “morning coffee”?) Coffee in the plunger. Taken to the Viewing Area (the name we have given to the part of our home that looks across the back yard to the farmland). Let sit for just the right amount of time, to brew and cool slightly. Poured into “my” mug. Topped up with creamy milk (Les gave me a milk frother for Christmas). Drinking chocolate sprinkled on top. Creamy milk eaten with a spoon. The remainder of the mug sipped as I chat with Les and look out at the world that is our view.

This ritual calms me. What more need I say?

Our Christmas Ritual - the Santa salt and pepper shakers,
the Christmas bonbons, the sparkling wine

We all have rituals. They help us feel safe. We get a bit tetchy when they are challenged, but that’s just because we are scared, and unsure of how we will cope with change. There’s nothing wrong with that, as long as we don’t hang on to those rituals at all costs. We need to know when to let them change, or even let them go.

The Definition of Insanity

“The definition of insanity is doing the same thing, over and over, and expecting a different result.” This quote has been attributed to quite a few people, including Albert Einstein, Benjamin Franklin, and Mark Twain. I’ve researched it now, and it seems it has been repeated, in some form or another, by so many people, so often, that it’s now considered all too hard to categorically state who said (or wrote) it first.

But that’s beside the point. I like what it says. I don’t mean in the proper, clinical definition of insanity. I’ve read a few articles by mental health professionals, and they seem to HATE this saying!!! Maybe they are thinking that it can discourage people from trying to form good habits (remember I talked about habits once?), and a cop-out when things get tough.

Anyway, what I mean is how I think it can apply to what we do in our everyday lives. Something has to change if I want to get a different result. That change could be big or small, maybe simply in how I think (did I say “simply”?).

My preferred place to exercise - outside.
Not going to happen in Bathurst in winter!!

Over the years, I’ve joined many gyms. So many times I joined up, thinking I would suddenly acquire the discipline needed to trot off there every day or so to get my required dose of exercise. Each time, I knew that this time it would result in me losing the weight I needed to lose, becoming more toned, increasing my fitness so I could be better at hockey, and above all, being one of those cool people!

Of course that didn’t happen. I think the longest I ever stayed a member of a gym was 2 years. And the longest I ever kept going to the gym was about 18 months – yep, I kept paying for membership of one gym for 6 months after I stopped going! I think the average time I was a member of a gym was less than a year. The shortest was 2 months.

Hmmmm - what can I say? This guy
probably does go to the gym!

Why did I keep on joining gyms? Why couldn’t I keep on using them? And why have I started going to the gym here in Bathurst? Am I insane!!!? Maybe.

I do realise that if I approach the gym the same way this time as I have in the past, I will get the same result. And yes, I’m insane if I think it will be any different. But this time, I’ve acknowledged that my past experience is to NOT persevere, and something has to be different this time if I want to get a different result.

So, this time, I haven’t actually joined the gym. It just happens to be where I go to attend my exercise class. That means that if I don’t go, it doesn’t cost me anything (that could be a bad thing). This time, the class I’ve chosen is made up of people who are there also for the social aspect as well as the physical. That means I feel involved in the class, that I’m noticed, and not just a shadow in the corner. This time, I’m realistic about what I want to get out of the gym. That way, I won’t be disappointed when I don’t become one of those cool people – that’s never going to happen!

This time, am I insane?

Well here we are!

It's been more than a week since my last post, but I've been a bit busy. Last Thursday, the removalists arrived at our place in Sydney and loaded us (well, our furniture, and all our other worldly possessions) into a full on semi-trailer! Our stuff only took up half the trailer, though. And I thought we had a lot of stuff - actually, we DO have a lot of stuff, but in the semi-trailer, it looked really little.

We drove up to Bathurst on Thursday afternoon, taking Maggie the nutso cat with us. She whinged for the first 30 seconds or so, then shut up, thank goodness. She wasn't happy, but she was good about it.

We slept on the most uncomfortable air mattress ever that night. Maggie emerged from hiding behind the curtains to sleep on a rug in a wardrobe - she is a wuss!

All our stuff arrived on Friday, and we have been unpacking ever since. We still have a long way to go, but at least the place feels comfy and like a home, not just a house.

No photos today - they will come later in the week, when we find the cables that connect the camera and phone to the computer. The computer was one of the first things unpacked, but we can't remember where the cables went. Oops.

Usually I would be working on the laptop, where I can connect direct from the camera or phone without cables, but the laptop has some sort of ailment. We don't know if it is terminal, but we will be taking it to the computer place today to see what can be done, or if it has to be put down.

I am SO looking forward to settling in here, and starting this next phase of my life. I have surprised myself - for once I am relishing the idea of change, instead of fearing it. I don't know how things work here, or how things will go for us, but I'm mostly comfortable with that. Les and I are a good team, and we support each other, so we will be fine.

Transporting Livestock

When we were rationalising things in preparation for our move to Bathurst, we took a careful look at what we had in our back garden. We had spent a lot of time and effort getting it to a point where we liked looking at it, and whilst we knew we couldn’t just take all the plants with us, we had other, non-plant things that reflected our personalities. We had to look at these things to see whether they were things we could let go of, or not.

the offending rain gauge

I’m a bit of a weather obsessive. Dad tried to teach all us kids about weather maps (isobars, high pressure systems, etc, etc), and whilst not all of it stuck in my head, the interest in the weather took hold. Anyway, because of this, we have a rain gauge. It’s getting quite old (it’s hard to read the numbers on the side of it, which kind of defeats the purpose of having it), so maybe we just buy a new one?

We have a wind-chime that my brother gave me as a gift. The bit that dangles down to catch the wind has fallen off, so it doesn’t chime very often (some would say that is the best kind of wind-chime to have!). Perhaps I can let go of the thought that throwing it out would be an insult to my brother. I do like the sound of wind-chimes, but I’m sure they sell them in Bathurst, so I can get one there.

Yes, I know, I’ve wandered off the point again. How does this all relate to transporting livestock?

Well, we have a worm farm. I’m pretty diligent about collecting scraps in the kitchen so things that can go into the worm farm don’t go into the garbage. Over the years, I’ve used the worm wee (or worm tea, as some more delicately put it) and the worm poo (worm castings) on the garden with wonderful results. And the worm factory is a couple of storeys high now.

But, would you believe it? Les had just assumed that we wouldn’t be taking it with us! He thought it fell into the category of “just get a new one” when we are in Bathurst. Hah! No way! What a waste of all that goodness, and it’s needed for setting up the vegie patch. Nothing better than worm waste to improve the soil.

So, the challenge was, how do we move the worm farm? Pretty sure the removalists won’t take it. If they won’t take any foodstuffs where the packets are open, I can’t see them taking a worm farm. Once Les had accepted that we were taking the worm farm with us, he quickly got onto solving the problem of how to transport our livestock, and their home, from Sydney to Bathurst, in our little Corolla. Issue #1 – how to fit the farm into the boot. Issue #2 – how to not make an almighty mess of the car. Issue #3 – how to make sure we don’t lose too many of the worms, through them going walkabout in the car (can a worm do that?).

garden decoration that IS going to Bathurst

Issue #1 was dealt with by taking the legs off the farm – easy peasy. Issue #2 was dealt with by making sure the tap was closed tightly, putting the farm on top of things to have it resting level, enclosing the whole thing inside a couple of heavy duty garbage bags, with a tarp underneath. Issue #3 wasn’t dealt with at all. I suppose I didn’t really think of that issue until we got to Bathurst and found that some of the worms had, indeed, gone walkabout. Why did they want to stray away from where the food was? Oh, well.

But, overall, it was a successful move. We didn’t lose too many worms, and the worm farm is now safely hidden down the side of the house, under a tree, with plenty of shade, and fairly easy for me to get to from the kitchen.

I just hope the transporting of our other livestock (Maggie the nutso cat) goes as smoothly!

Rationalising Things

We are deep into the packing phase of our move to Bathurst. It feels like we’ve been packing for months! Each day, when I sit down at the end of it, I think that there can’t possibly be much more to do, then the next morning, we just keep on going. Does it never end?



the main bedroom - full of boxes
even the soft toys have been packed!

But I am grateful for this opportunity. One of the reasons the packing is taking time is we are not just packing everything, we are looking at each thing and saying “do we really need this?”. Both of us are hoarders, to a certain extent. One of us more than the other (I’m not saying who is worse, but it’s not me J), and that creates little challenges. But we will get through it. We discuss things, like rational human beings. We are rationalising things, after all.



It is said that it can be quite liberating to get rid of things that have been hanging around, taking up space. I believe that is true. In the past, I’ve had times when I’ve said to myself “just do it!!!” and when the things were gone, I felt really good.

a selection of the soft toys that have now been packed

An example (I love examples!). I have WAY too many clothes in my wardrobe, but only wear a small portion of them. Why do I have all those other clothes in there? There are so many reasons – I love the item and dream that one day I will be able to fit into it again; I wore the item to an event where I had an absolute ball, and just looking at it reminds me of that time; I honestly forgot I even had it; I think that the style will come back into fashion one day (who am I kidding?).



some of the shooter glasses, collected on my
travels around the world - these have been
given away

About 6 months or so ago, as the season was changing from winter to spring, I was getting out my warm weather clothes, and thought I’d rationalise all those other clothes while I was moving things around. I got serious about it, and before I knew it, I had several bags of stuff to go to the charity shop, and some that just went into the garbage. It felt really good to be getting rid of them. It felt like I was cleaning out the cobwebs in my mind at the same time as I was cleaning out the cobwebs in my wardrobe.

And making space for new stuff!!! Getting rid of things from the past, to make way for the future. New clothes, new thoughts!


Maggie pretending nothing is happening -
we won't "pack" her until the last minute

We are trying to do the same thing with the “stuff” in our house. Even the removalists have said that we have a lot of “stuff”.

I’m not getting rid of everything that doesn’t satisfy the “do I need it?” question, though. I’m keeping some things just because I want to. I am who I am because of what I’ve done, how I’ve thought and reacted, where I’ve been, and some of that “stuff” reminds me of that – how I came to be me. I don’t want to just give that away.

Well, that how I’m rationalising it to myself, anyway.